Since I last wrote, I've been in pain. The chemo settled in alright. In fact, if any cell grew on my body, the chemo slaughtered it like it was a scene out of the Old Testament. Before even getting to my belly, I would be able to follow the path of any morsel of liquid or solid food stuffs because it laid a passage of needling pain. My tongue felt like someone cut if off, another vague Biblical image I might add. And while I don't have any mouth sores, my mouth is still really, really sore.
My belly would give me sharp pains throughout the day as a response to not having any blood cells to fight an infectious disease. My feet and hands feel like their grazing the tip of a knife. I would say they feel like someone is pounding stakes into them to continue this biblical theme but that would be overstating it a bit too much even for the sake of continuing a theme.
And boy have I had fun with side effects. I keep getting red all over my body. So it feels like I got sunburn all over. In Houston that would take, ah, a trip from the Pizza Hut to the car in the parking lot. My bald dome is filled with zits ( as a result of a virus) and can drive me nuts with itching. One night a doctor (I'll bet it was really a PA) said that there was nothing to give me besides Benedryl (that all-purpose drug again) and so I spent a night with a wet wash cloth on my head.
Through the days and nights, I never puked. I've been close even earlier today but a combination of science (nausea drugs) and Michael science (munching on cereal all day even if it hurts to swallow) might have done did the trick.
My time has been spent like this: get out of bed and into a shower about 9 am after not sleeping most of the night; take shower, sometimes sitting; get out of shower and onto a chair for an hour; try to go for a walk around the ward and think about ordering lunch; don't order lunch; go to an "Exercise class" which is basically a class that gets you to move muscles; get back and nap; stay in bed rest of day and night. Now, generally, I would find this routine to be the most satisfying of anything I could possible do only there's that bit of cancer. Cancer can even ruin some good off-time.
On only a few occasions did I just lay and feel miserable. Usually, I tried to keep my mind occupied with kiddie porn and elf sex. Okay, not elf sex all the time. Actually my dad came down and now my beautiful and brave wife is here. Everyone keeps telling me that I'm courageous. She's the hero. She has to be Dad and Mom to two kids, while pregnant, fly to Houston to play Dad and Mom to me, keep the house in order, schedule babysitters and kid routines, fight with insurance companies and assorted medical personnel and oh yeah, keep it all together. That's more hero than most people I've ever known and certainly more admirable than my situation. I'm just sitting here feeling miserable and watching elf sex.
Right now, the pain is subsiding a bit and my energy is picking up at least enough to write this. As you can guess, I'm probably over the rough stuff. Even though I'm almost continuously on pain meds now, I'm not as pained when on them. I still can't sleep because now they have me on a new steroid as well as a whole new bucket of pills. We got stuff for my liver, more stuff for my stomach, stuff for my mouth, stuff for my hands and feet. They just bring them in. I swallow.