Thursday, October 27, 2011

Well, that was fun.

I have a lump in my left boob. It's either a lymphoma relapse or breast cancer. Odds are on the relapse. If that is the case, then the best treatment out there for hodgkin's is no match for my monster. Basically, since this didn't work, it's doubtful anything will. The tumors are back and this time they're not leaving. The best I can do now is slow it down. I'm very tired. I never thought it was unfair that I got this. People get diseases every day. My buddy Scott, Cari and Susan at work all have Crohn's. But I do think it is very unfair that I have never been able to enjoy a relapse. I'm going on year four. That's 1,460 days. It's hard. Every morning I get up and the biggest goal is to find the time to forget, to feel better or hide what I feel. Most of the time I can get an hour or two at night. Within a couple of months that will be gone. I just wanted a couple more months. If you're tired of reading about my whining once again, I'm sorry. I wish I could write about something else. I think I'm going to have a beer. It will hurt. But I don't give a fuck.

Oh, one other thing. After we landed in New York, the guy in front of me deplaned but he left his wallet on his seat. I picked it up and gave it right to the flight attendant. I didn't even check to see how much he had. Wouldn't that good deed get me a month or two without this disease?

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